The Underdog Triumphs

Sunday, November 13, 2005

Pity Party

Right now, I should be in San Francisco smoking a J with my bro gearing up to go to the Rolling Stones concert.

Instead I'm here in the Windy City, drinking decaf, procrastinating finishing my paper for Tuesdays class thinking about how life rarely turns out the way you think it does.

I was having a discussion with a friend recently about just that. Maybe because I ended up having a miserable college experience that I used to daydream about how life would be after graduation and I moved back to Chicago. I fantasized about having a fabulous job, wardrobe, apartment, and boyfriend. Tons of friends to call to brunch and meet for evening cocktails.

Instead the only job I could find was a secretarial position and I ended up having to stay with my dad and stepmom for a year and a half. I worked as a secretary for 3 years. There are only aged, fading clothes in the closet. My apartment is less than fabulous. Boyfriend has yet to even make a cameo.

How much more can I do to help myself change my life?

In the past year I gained new employment, finally not a secretary. I joined a gym, bookclub, went on dates, started a Master's program...but there are still holes. Still hopes I'm waiting for to fill them. But how much longer will it take until I feel I have this fabulous life I've been waiting for?

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